So, I still get asked a couple of times a day about why I'm not on Facebook anymore...the short answer I give is that I just got bored with it...in actuality, I just got really annoyed with it and decided I had enough of it...but I still love the shocked look on people's faces that I could have done such a thing...here's the story...
I was sitting on my couch on a Sunday night and decided to check my facebook like I had about 4 or 5 times before during the day...but this one time would end up being my last...Something drove me over the edge when looking at the "news feed" from all my friends...
The first thing to come up...
"Mike" has defeated Al Capown3d in an epic battle and has now become an underboss...Do you have what it takes to be a mafioso?
Do I have what it takes? What does it take to be a mafioso? A computer, a solid internet connection and an account with Facebook? Then yes, I guess I have what it takes...must have been a great achievement for Mike to share this with all of his friends...doesn't mean that I care anymore about this... Frustration Factor: 1/10
Second thing...
Ronnie's fish is very sick in his aquarium and is in desperate need of being fed...Do you want to remind him to feed his fish?
Uhh...no...if Ronnie can't take care of his responsibilites for his virtual pet, then why should I do anything about it? Could you imagine what his reaction would be if I were to call him in a panic and tell him to feed his fish... Frustration Factor: 2/10
Third thing...
Allie just finished plowing her farm on Farmville for the day and shared her crops with Adam...Would you like to get in on the sharing?
I hate sharing anything, let alone my make-believe harvest...so no, I don't want to get it on the sharing...what is with these people that have all the time in the world for their virtual farms? I guarantee you that if they were faced with doing actual farm work, they would vomit on the spot... Frustration Factor: 4/10
Fourth thing...
James is now single...
Oh god, here we go again...looks like James had another fight with his girlfriend...but James is one of those people that likes to let people know about his rocky relationship by changing his relationship status every 20 minutes...by the time I log back in, he'll be back in a relationship again...
At least he isn't one of these losers that decides is a good idea to put "It's Complicated" as their relationship status...do the rest of the world a favour and leave it blank!
When a guy has "It's Complicated" as his status, it means one of two things: 1) He's single and he's trying a way to look cooler to the ladies or 2) He's simply using Facebook as his own personal dating site and he belives that "It's Complicated" will allow for him to have that little bit of mystery that girls like in a guy...
When a girl has "It's Complicated" as his status, stay the hell away! I know very little women, but what I do know is that they tend not to put their problems out there for public consumption, particularly about their love life...so if this girl is willing to put it out there, then you know there's a couple of screws loose... Frustration Factor: 6/10
Fifth Thing...
Barry is sleepy
Wow! My life is that much better because of being able to see that insightful status...I would bet everything I have that in typing those nine extra characters beside his name, it probably took 'ol Barry 10 minutes to decide on whether or not that was going to be his status for the time being... Frustration Factor: 8/10
Sixth and Final Thing...
Sam Jones has requested to be your friend...
Sam Jones wants to be my friend? Isn't this the same Sam Jones that thought he was the coolest guy in school and treated everyone else like garbage? Isn't this the same Sam Jones that wouldn't give me the time of day when I tried to start a converstation in the locker room when we played on the same soccer team? And now he wants to be my friend all of a sudden....
I'm all for re-connecting with people from high school, and hell, I still have some friends from high school that I talk to on a regular basis and it's almost been a decade already...but there are also some people from school that I could go my whole life without even hearing about and I wouldn't lose a wink of sleep over it... Frustration Factor: 10/10
That was the final straw and I decided right there to de-activate my account...I'm now officially a twitter guy, so feel free to follow me on twitter... @showkiller1200
I think I'm gonna go back to writing in 140 character sentences tomorrow!